The Heart Never Learns

.............i can' t hold my breathe........can' t seem to get my bearing right........I'm exhausted, i can' t fight anymore..........where am i?.......where am i?.......the effort to remember is just so much and i pass out again............

I come again and its so cold. Up ahead i see a withered ref rose. My head is filled with so many memories that i just wish i' d forget. Pity, there is no delete button in the human system.

She had gone. She who, at one time, i thought she was responsible for the very survival of my heart beat. Someone said,''the heart is not so smart'', wish i would have believed him or was it her(pardon my disorientation).......what was that?.......a small voice in my brain just said,''i told you so''. One would think that it was not a part of me.

Years spent on teaching my heart to do two tasks at a time, just went up in smoke. Though hard, it had learn t to ensure that my veins never run dry and at the same time, beat to the tune of love. Now, it came close to ensuring that i became non-existent as it over flooded my veins with a liquid that is vital for your presence in this universe. It had bee sacked from one of its tasks and thought that the energy should be directed to pumping more blood through my veins and that if necessary, my system would construct a dam to reserve the excess blood. Talk about it being dumb. Stupidity to a whole new level.

In the sea of emotions, i was lost. My fear of water exceeding the bucket capacity, is unrivaled. The waves carried my tired being and threw me in parts unknown. Nearly 12 hours of my life never to be recovered and not a single memory of what had transpired in that period. I get up, dust myself, or maybe in this case, mud and grass or is it weed myself? Got lots of that combination all over me. I vow not to trust my heart and give my brain the power to dictate all that takes place from now on. After the little stint of my veins wanting to open up, i' m taking no more chances with my heart.

As my brain dances in triumph, and my heart is a little bored for it only has one task to perform, i come across a clearing and there before me is the full definition of beauty. She turns and smile makes the sun shy away. As i go towards her, i think my brain just went bananas. Its seething with anger trying to remind me of a vow i made not so long ago. I have no idea why its throwing tantrums while my heart starts getting excited as a smile starts to form at the corner of my mouth...............