KENYAN HOUSEHELPS @ 7000: The Calculation Crash

Hey there! There is a new crap-wave hitting the country. Apparently the government wants us to pay househelps a whooping 7000kes on a monthly basis. And you kept wondering why a sudden foul stench has been warping our conscience this past week!

This is according to a Gazette Notice by a certain full-o'-crap-than-thou Minister of Labour, John Munyes, which insists on these new regulations of minimum wages for househelp. Major cities will require to pay 7586kes while other counties 7000kes failure to which there is a penalty of being a state's guest for six months or a 50000kes fine.


Apart from that, the Household Executives, as i believe they will henceforth be called because of the fanciful enumerations, they will get House Allowance 15% of salary, two days per week rest, annual leave with full salary and Pension on retirement. Somebody please scream RAPE!

I am no stranger to bull-crap, but by Jove! never have i encountered such skunk-y and highly manured balderdash that this. This is just funny. Painfully funny. The kind of funny that makes you laugh while your intestines are twisting and your eyes puffing out with tears. Who, in Jeezuz name, comes up with these projections and recommendations? It is unfortunate that a crop of petty bourgeois can strive and work so hard just to prove how disgusting they are than what nature intended them to be.Because, if one is privy with Kenyan Economical transgression, as every Government Leader should, insipid recommendations like that would have found its place in a shredder before conclusion was made.

Even if one was feeling sufficiently philanthropic to co-operate with the 'decree', the task would prove impossible. The requirement is astronomical for a house-hold to implement, what with the pay package that is not that thrilling, house rents and mortgages with disheartening figures, electricity and water bills shooting through the roof and food prices hiking on hourly basis. Even FKE's Executive Secretary, Jackie Mugo or a name to that effect, has a bad feeling about this whole 'nothing'.

No one disputes the important tasks mboch has in our homes, from looking after the kids when parents are working, cleaning utensils, helping kids with school assignments to laundry have. (But it should not be forgotten that they can easily finish a family with STDs, cause divorce or steal a kid among other really scary things). That, though, should not cloud our reasoning and jump to imposing impossible and wicked regulations!